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Books about Mediation

The Mediation Process : Practical Strategies for Resolving Conflict by Christopher W. Moore Check Pricing & Availability at  Amazon.com

 

The Promise of Mediation : Responding to Conflict Through Empowerment and Recognition by Robert A. Baruch Bush and Joseph P. Folger Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Divorce Mediation : Theory and Practice by Jay Folberg (Editor), Ann Milne (Editor), Jay Forberg Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 
 
 
 

 

Books about Divorce & Separation

 

Divorce and Money : How to Make the Best  Financial Decisions During Divorce  by Violet Woodhouse, Victoria Collins, M. C. Blakeman  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

The Good Divorce:  Keeping Your Family Together When Your Marriage Comes Apart by Constance Ahrons Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Crazy Time:  Surviving Divorce &  Bulding a New Live by Abigail Trafford This is a good book for everyone going through a divorce - and a good book for mediators too.  This is truly one of my favorites, and I've heard more than one divorced person recommend it. Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Uncoupling:  Turning Points in  Intimate Relationships by Diane Vaughn Covers the step by step dynamics of break-up.  Especially helpful at distinguishing  - and addressing - the concerns of both the initiator and the one who is "left behind." Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

How to Avoid the Divorce from Hell:  And Dance Together at Your Daughter's Wedding by M. Sue Talia This book gives straight answers to difficult questions about surviving - and thriving after  - a difficult divorce.  It says the stuff your mediator and attorny can't or won't say!  My favorite is her answer to "What am I supposed to do if my ex had an affair?  Lie to my kids?"  To which Talia replies "In a word...YES!"  Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Communicating with a Former Spouse by Vincent Gerard Molina & Barry Spilchuk Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Between Love and Hate : A Guide to Civilized Divorce by Lois Gold Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Impasses of Divorce: The Dynamics and  Resolution of Family Conflict by Janet R. Johnston, Linda E. G. Campbell & Judith S. Wallerstein Recommended by mediator John Hurst  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Untying the Knot : Ex-Husbands, Ex-Wives and  Other Experts on the Passage of Divorce by Deborah Brodie (Editor) &  Ashton Applewhite This is a book that manages to be all of humorous, witty and  wise about a difficult topic.  The authors reflect on a diversity of real-life insights and perspectives  from every  type of divorcing spouse.  Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Necessary Losses : The Loves, Illusions, Dependencies,  and Impossible Expectations That All of Us  Have to Give Up in Order to Grow by Judith Viorst Although this book and Imperfect Control, both by Judith Viorst, cover a variety of topics the focus is on couples in divorce wars who are still locked in a power struggle.  How does someone deal with the concept that they now have very limited control (if any) over their ex?  No more unilateral decision making.  No more, "I have to work, so you HAVE to pick up the kids."  OR "you need to..." Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Imperfect Control : Our Lifelong Struggles With Power and Surrender by Judith Viorst Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 
 
 
 

 

Books about Relationships & Communications

 

True Loves : Finding the Soul in Love Relationships by Alex T. Quenk & Naomi L. Quenk Despite the touchy-feely name, this book takes a fairly concrete, realistic approach in outlining how different personality types have very different expectations for relationships.  The book shows how all of these expectations may be acceptable, though not necessarily compatible without some real work.   Similar to Myer's Briggs, the authors' approach is based on Jungian personality types.  Its helpful in figuring out why the relationship didn't work, how to get it right next time, and how dealing with your ex may continue to be difficult if you do not learn to accept each other.   Why they couldn't find a better title I really don't know! Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Working Through Conflict : Strategies for Relationships, Groups, and Organizations by Joseph P. Folger, Marshall Scott Poole, Randall K.Stuttman Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

You Just Don't Understand by Deborah Tannen Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

How to Talk So Kids Will Listen &  Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish, Kimberly Ann Coe Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

The Complete Idiot's Guide to  Getting Along With Difficult People by Brandon Toropov Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 
 

 

Books about Parenting & Custody

 

Mom's House, Dad's House : A Complete Guide for Parents Who Are Separated, Divorced, or Remarried  by Isolina, Ph.D. Ricci Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Child Custody:  Building Parenting Agreements  That Work(3rd Ed)  by Mimi E. Lyster, Spencer Sherman & Martin Stein Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Joint Custody With a Jerk : Raising a Child With an Uncooperative Ex by Julia A. Ross, Judy Corcoran & Ross Corcoran The authors offer a variety of strategies for dealing with your uncooperative ex.  But a real jerk could easily outmaneuver their proposed strategies!!  Recommended as a last straw or for you to buy for your ex-spouse.  We can all be jerks sometimes! Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 
 
 
 

 

Books about Understanding Children

 

Children of Divorce : A Developmental Approach to  Residence and Visitation  by Mitchell A.,Ph.D. Baris, Carla B., Ph.D. Garrity Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Vicki Lansky's Divorce Book for Parents: Helping  Your Children Cope With Divorce and Its Aftermath by Vicki Lansky Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce by Judith S. Wallerstein, Julia M. Lewis, Sandra Blakeslee, Julie Lewis During the last 40 years, our society's views on how families are created and how they operate has undergone a tremendous shift. The authors have assembled a variety of stories from people of different ages and life stages.  Separate chapters focus on the different roles children take on in the event of a divorce or unhappy marriage, ranging from positive role model to deeply troubled adolescent. Both encouraging and thought-provoking, the final chapter questions how we maintain the freedom made possible by divorce while, at the same time, minimizing the damage. Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Nurture by Nature : Understanding Your Child's  Personality Type - And Becoming a Better Parent by Barbara Barron-Tieger, Paul D. Tieger & E. Michael Ellowich Both parents want what's best for their child, but may be in disagreement on what that means.  All children are different.  So some need extra freedom and space, and some need extra cuddling and closeness. Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

 

Books about Conflict Resolution & Negotiations

 

Getting to Yes:  Negotiating Agreement  Without Giving In  by Roger Fisher, William Ury & Bruce Patton  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Conflict Resolution : Its Language and Processes by John W. Burton Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

Designing Conflict Management Systems : A Guide to Creating Productive and Healthy Organizations by Cathy A. Costantino & Christina Sickles Merchant Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

The Complete Idiot's Guide Winning Through Negotiation by John Ilich & Sheri B.Paige, Esq. My favorite section in this book is the listing of things never to do in a negotiation , such as eye-rolling and personal attacks -  even when  you know the other person deserves it. Pam Fukumitsu, NVMS Mediation Coordinator  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com

 

When Talking Makes Things Worse! :  Resolving Problems When Communication Fails by David Stiebel, David Horsey Saying the wrong thing can make things worse.  Check Pricing & Availability at Amazon.com