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Male Survivors

If you are a gay or bisexual male, you may feel that somehow you "brought this on" to yourself. You may fear disclosure of your sexual orientation. And you may know your assailant: he could be an acquaintance, a friend, a work supervisor, a professor, a date. The elsewhere is this material can help you find gay-affirmative counseling. The section for lesbian survivors may also be helpful. Feeling responsible is a normal reaction to sexual assault.

There is some evidence that males involved in homosexual activity or relationships are vulnerable to sexual assault. In some cases, males may consent to a certain level of sexual contact, only to be coerced or forced into additional activity by another male.

Males who live in certain living restrictive settings, such as detention centers and prisons, are more likely than others to be sexually assaulted. In these cases, they may be assaulted either by peers or by those in authority (e.g., prison guards).

Though there are few reports of males being sexually assaulted by females, we cannot assume that it does not happen. These instances may be subtle and probably would involve stereotypical assumptions about male sexuality that make it difficult to identify them as sexual assaults. Some of these assumptions include:

1. males are always ready and eager to have sex;
2. males must always be sexually dominant and in control; and
3. sexual activity with a woman is desirable under any circumstances - and therefore cannot be traumatic. When a female initiates sexual contact based on these assumptions, it may be difficult for the male to let her know he is an unwilling participant.

If a male feels he has been assaulted by either a female or another male, he might be reluctant to report it or seek help because of the fear that he will be perceived as un-masculine/homosexual or that others will not take his complaint seriously.

Feeling responsible is a normal reaction to sexual assault. However, sexual assault is never the responsibility of the survivor. You did nothing to deserve this. You may want to talk to someone about your feelings. There are counselors in the area who are skilled in working with male survivors of sexual assault.

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